I started refereeing almost 10 years ago, at the age of 14. I got into the top league in Hungary in 2014 and it’s been an awesome experience for me. I’m sure all referees know how challenging it is to be the „rookie” in a league. We would always like to perform perfectly, no matter what game we officiate. When I got into the highest league, I quickly realized it’s a lot more about mental abilities than ever before so I decided to look for help to strengthen my mental state. I was lucky enough to know Peter for a long time, who could have given me expert advice.
Honestly, I never paid too much attention to stuff like NLP before, then I participated at a clinic where Peter gave us introduction on what it’s really about and it made me curious how it would work for me. A few months ago I began to take lessons at referee mindset online course. This process has helped me to be more open to changes and see them as possibilities and not as something to be afraid of. It would be quite difficult to describe how it has helped me along the way, so I’d rather tell you a short story that recently happened to me on the court, when I realized how much I had developed the mental aspect of my officiating!
There was a very intense game a few weeks ago. We were focused a lot to do a good job but an awkward situation occurred, and negative reactions came from one of the teams in the following days. Of course I was frustrated… who likes to fail or being criticized?! Then I took the consequences, what and how I would do differently if it happened to me again and I know I learnt a lot from it.
Let’s say it was that point when I really identified the benefits of changing. Back in time it took much longer to handle failure on and off the court as well because sometimes my saboteur seemed to be stronger than my sage but I surprised myself in this case… After this experience, I could move on so fast and let my negative emotions go away which was a great feeling. I could get over this situation without blaming myself and I accepted it as it was, I didn’t want to change it, just to learn from it.
I can feel how much better I am at managing my emotions. It helps me to stay focused on my goals and on my games.